Adult Amateur Life

I took Murphy and loaded him up Sunday morning and trailered out for a lesson. And what a lesson! My abs—actually, scratch that, everything—feels really sore. (I mean, I also had a headache for about five days last week, so there’s that too lol.)

I have 0 media except this picture I took after I got back. This is what happens when you are just out there doing your hobby all by your lonesome. Being a mom and owning your own farm is wonderful, but it also truly stinks sometimes.

I reallllyyyy wish i had some media of my lesson

I haven’t had a lesson in quite some time (I think months), so it was really nice to hear that my trainer was impressed with the change in Murphy since she had seen us last! He was actually using his whole body and swinging his hips, and immediately went around on a nice long rein. Before, he would be more like a jackhammer running around, so PROGRESS.

The bulk of the lesson was cantering—getting a nice working canter and keeping his body straight without bending his neck. My homework is lots and lots of cantering and to throw some poles on the ground.

My other homework? Go to two shows.

Not compete at two shows. Just go.

The plan is to go to two shows without Murphy and get used to the whole show environment without any pressure. Figure out where everything is, watch how things work, and make the whole thing feel a little less foreign.

Then, the third time, I bring Murphy.

And probably still don't compete.

I can just trailer him in, let him walk around and experience everything, and if at the last second I feel like entering something, I can. But there is absolutely no pressure to do it.

As someone who entered the horse world completely on my own as an adult, hearing that plan gave me SO much peace. Because I’ll be honest: I am a ball of anxiety with new stuff.

I used to drag my sisters to help me when I hauled i was so nervous - this is 7 years ago holy cow

There are so many things about horses that I think people who grew up in this world don't even realize they know. I've had to learn all of it as I go. I learned how to trailer and haul by myself. I took actual lessons on loading Murphy (excellent use of money, BTW—this has served me SO well). And showing feels like the next big thing that I don't know how to do yet.

But I can learn that too.

yes i wrote this with a dry erase mark

I LOVE having concrete goals to work toward, so I’m genuinely excited to make this happen. I can go watch the shows. I can take Murphy. I can make the scary/new thing boring and normal.

And one day I WILL be out at shows jumping things and just having fun!!

It will happen!

Anyways, hope everyone has a light in their eyes and hope in their heart today.